Jealousy Stop Being Jealous

Hypnotherapy And NLP To Overcome Jealousy

Hypnotherapy and NLP can be wonderful tools to stop someone being jealous, to retrain the mind to respond differently to those ‘trigger’ situations which previously resulted in the green-eyed monster rearing its head. For more info on how we help with the issue of jealousy go here - Stop Being Jealous

How does NLP and Hypnotherapy Stop People From Being Jealous?

Well, there are so many ways the mind can be retrained; here is an example of one.

‘I am the most jealous woman in the world!’

These were the first words from a woman I saw last year. I doubted that she was the most jealous so I asked her what had lead her to that conclusion.

‘I destroyed my boyfriend’s mobile phone last week’, she answered.

Well this certainly didn’t qualify her for the title of the most jealous person in the world, I had seen many clients who had thrown things out of windows, burnt diaries, broken mobile phones and so forth, and I told her this.

‘No, you don’t understand’, she said, ‘I did it with my teeth!’

I looked into her intense non-blinking eyes and asked her if she had been foaming at the mouth at the time.

For a moment I thought I had pushed it a bit far, she looked angry, but then she laughed and said yes, she probably had been foaming at the mouth.

Her boyfriend had been innocent, naturally

Well, not ‘naturally’, come to think about it. Sometimes there is good reason for jealousy but on this occasion there wasn’t, she had just gone through his text messages whilst he was out and found one that she had misinterpreted. Big time.

‘What do you do for a living?’ I asked her, and she said she was a set designer for theatres and TV.

Good, I thought, here’s someone who makes three dimensional images in her head for a living.

Stop Being Jealous – Use The Theatre Of The Mind

Some people will find the following process seems a bit vague when they do it. Typically, though, people who want to stop being jealous have really well developed imaginations and they tend to be fairly full-on emotionally (when they are angry they are very angry, when they are excited they are very excited, and so forth). This isn’t always the case.

What I said to her was this:

‘Close your eyes and find yourself in a big, empty, comfortable imaginary theatre, sitting in the stalls, several rows back, in the kind of place the director might sit in rehearsals.

Now up on the stage see an actress standing there, an actress who looks exactly like you in every detail. Have her standing there, waiting for direction. Now, in your mind, build a set (it’s what she did for a living, after all), a set which exactly resembles a place where typically you may have had a jealous outburst. Now put the other actresses and actors (if there is anyone else there) on stage too, and have them all standing around waiting for you to tell them what to do.

Now run the first act as a horribly outrageously ham acted amateur production of over the top jealousy. See yourself running up and down the stage with flailing arms and wild hair, screaming and bouncing up and down with steam coming out of your ears until you accidentally fall of the stage into the orchestra pit with a big ‘thump’.’

She was smiling at this point.

So we have achieved ‘disassociation’ and ‘humour’ within moments.

‘Now have some oiled body-builders haul you up out of the orchestra pit and straighten your clothing for you. Now set the scene up again, only this time I want you to have the actress up there on the stage give a totally professional Oscar winning performance as someone who is cool, calm and collected in some situation which previously would have caused extreme jealousy. Now run the scene in your mind’s eye, see yourself being totally the person you would like to be, behaving and acting in an ideal way.’

She found this easy

‘Now, go up onto the stage and stand there in the set so that this time when you see the actress give her Oscar winning performance you can see it close up. Move around the stage and see yourself (the actress) from different positions, left profile, right profile, above, behind and in front. See yourself being truly amazing.
Now step into the actress and be the actress. Run the scene as if you ARE the Oscar winning actress and at the end, turn and see 5000 people giving you a standing ovation and throwing roses onto the stage.’

There was a bit more to the session than this visualisation technique, but she found it very powerful and liberating to be actually in control of her imagination for a change, rather than having it the other way round.

People who want to stop being jealous have unwittingly learned to respond that way. It doesn’t matter when and where they learned jealousy, what matters is they learn to stop being jealous and these sorts of techniques really do help people to get back in control of their mind.

There is also a hypnosis recording here Overcome Jealousy that can help you to get back in control of your mind, and your life.